Yubedee Pyamene Anokari
Getting into the university, I fell in love with Dami at my first year. For the first time in as long as I can remember, a girl actually loved me and cared – true love was here, or so I thought. I didn’t want to rush things, so I took it slow. We would just sit together, talking for hours unending, looking into each others eyes – no kissing, no touching, just love. Always enjoying each others company, I felt I was on to something with Dami, we had everything going right for us. We did almost everything together and even on weekends, we just loved seeing each other; I’ll leave my campus to hers and we would just love on each other – walking, talking, smiling, giggling and laughing. The most body contact we made was holding hands.
By the end of second semester towards exams, disaster struck, she stopped taking my calls regularly and she always had an excuse for us not to hang out as usual. It continued for few weeks and it took a toll on me cos I was too fond of her. Finally I had to confront her about it; she told me to my face I was a dullard, a naïve small boy, that I couldn’t even kiss her, touch her or make other advances at her when we were together. I was dazed! Really shocked at her response, here I was thinking I was being a gentleman by taking things slow – guess I was wrong and without a shadow of doubt, I was heartbroken; it showed on my results as my grades dropped noticeably.
About a month into my second year, I met Lisa at a campus fellowship my friend Dayo had invited me to. She gave the announcements that day, so I figured she was an EXCO there. We continued been friends for a while, I didn’t want to hurriedly get myself hurt again, but then, my heart seemed to love again. I took the bold step and we soon started dating. Having fresh in mind, my experience with Dami, I didn’t want to be a “dullard” no more but then, Lisa was an EXCO in a Christian campus fellowship! So I presumed she ordinarily wouldn’t be interested in all that in the first place, but boy! I was totally wrong! We both had our experience of pleasure at different times, I was glad I met her.
Our love continued and nothing went wrong for a very long time, I was beginning to think long term. But then getting into my third year, I started hearing rumors from friends that my Lisa has had a more serious date since year one, which she normally visits on weekends off campus. Could it be that’s the reason she wasn’t always available on weekends? I was beginning to put bits and pieces together, but still I didn’t want to readily believe all that, cos boy, I really loved her!
However, somehow, I finally confronted her about it as usual, and then she broke down in tears, saying she loved me and didn’t know how to tell me. I was scarred for life! My heart was shattered. Will I ever love again? These and more raced through my mind for weeks then I finally gave an answer to myself and for sure it wasn’t positive.
So from then on, I decided I was going to payback all the hurt I went through; every pain, every heartbreak and every tear. So by the end of second semester of my third year, I had been in numerous relationships with different girls, can scarcely recall their names – with those I knew had a boyfriend, I somehow got them to love me, leave their boyfriends, we had fun, then I broke their hearts. I double-dated countless times than I can remember, when I get caught, I just left the whole thing. Twice I had dated two best friends at the same time, it was so much fun! Or so I thought.
It continued till I meet Ese, that was at the second semester of my fourth and final year. I couldn’t believe I could genuinely fall in love again with a girl, but here I was, totally head over heels in love with her. But sadly, we were running out of time, it was our final year in the university; we had barely three months left to graduate, I didn’t know what to do. Confused at the very thought of – should I push for this or should I just let it slide. I guess I chose the former; she had won my heart.
I finally asked her out, but before I could get a a reply from her, we had finished our final exams, project defense done and dusted. Everything was over, everyone had left school; school was over. I never got a reply from Ese, but somehow I knew she loved me too, or so I thought. Maybe I’d still get a response or may be not, guess I’ll never know – we never know what life has in store for us.
That was it, the bitter-sweet taste experience of my love life at the university. For the most part it was fun, but then, I had had my fair share of heartbreaks too. I’m done with the university now, I am out in the real world, I hope I find real love too, lasting love – true love, is that an ask too hard?
Yubedee Pyamene Anokari, is a contributor on the blog, an amazing content writer and entrepreneur. Currently a student of environmental studies at the University of Port Harcourt, an SDG advocate, passionate about personal growth and development.